September 5, 2012 by Emily Pergament

This chat brought to you by Emily and Rob. They’re 25 days away from their wedding, so let’s hope this doesn’t get too ugly.

Speaking of ugly, let’s get these pictures out of the way. Waiting for our food to arrive, we had a Maroney-off. Who made the better face?

Rob: Obviously Emily is more skilled at being unimpressed. I am too easily swayed.

Emily: You’re never pissed off enough. Anyway, I can’t believe the ONE time we decide to write about Bareburger, is the ONE time I’ve ever sent food back. I feel awful. We have been there a million times!

Rob: Why don’t you explain to our dear readers what happened.

Emily: Fine. We went with a Groupon to our neighborhood BB. We bought four to use, which expire in November. So we do have to go. Plus we love it. This is one of the few places we’ll eat at without a Groupon, Savored or general happy hour deal. We LOVE BB! I decided to try something different, so I got bison meat. The waiter recommended it medium-rare. I looked at Rob nervously because my parents NEVER ate anything rare and I never eat mammals, but I wanted to be adventurous, so I said ok. When it came out, it looked like this:

but inside it was completely uncooked!

Rob: I do have to take some responsibility for Undercookedgate 2012. You looked at me a few times while he was recommending it to be medium rare, and I nodded and then made some sort of verbal affirmation of the wisdom of this choice. In case anyone is wondering, I put my finger in there and it was cold, a sure sign it hadn’t been cooked long enough.

Emily: I took like 2 bites and I can guarantee the waiter noticed I wasn’t eating it but refused to come to our table to ask how it was, even though he was asking everyone else. FINALLY the manager came over and asked how everything was, and I just asked for a cajun chicken burger of the same kind I’d originally ordered (the Original – lettuce, tomato, onion, cheese and Bareburger sauce). Once the chicken burger (which isn’t ground chicken, it’s a cajun-seasoned chicken breast) came out, I scarfed that sh*t down cuz I was hungray!!! Take it away Rob, why not hit us with a little background on what BB is like in general.

Rob: Bareburger is basically Five Guys for hipsters. Everything is grass-fed and organic, but there is absolutely no compromise on taste. I love Bareburger. The burgers are juicy and salty, and the combinations are great. The Bareburger Supreme has bacon and two actual onion rings piled high, while The Ruby has pastrami and fried pickles (You can also make your own combo). I usually go for straight beef because its hard to taste the difference with all the toppings. And everything is around ten dollars, a real bargain in my opinion for such tasty artisan burgers.

Emily: Bert, you didn’t even mention all the various meats they have! They have beef, turkey, veggie patty, and some standard options. Then for more money, they have weird things like ostrich, elk and… bison. Shiver. Also, I’d not say it’s like Five Guys. It’s a sit-down restaurant, it’s pretty expensive for what you get, it’s not a full-blown chain (I believe there are 8 locations in NYC), and I don’t think there are as many options. The fries are similar, I believe, but I haven’t been to FG since high school. The fries at BB are SO GOOD – they are cooked in peanut oil and come with three dipping sauces. Agghh they’re my favorite part of a BB meal, and we didn’t even get them today. It was karma, Robby.

Rob: I admit that not getting the fries for the first time ever was an unacceptable challenge to the universe for which you paid dearly. I enjoyed the fried pickle basket we got instead and my burger was great.

Frickles with horseradish mayo

We should remind our dear friends that when they go to the neighborhood Bareburger, they should order the fries basket for five bucks instead of adding on fries to each meal for three dollars. You get way more fries in the basket too. I should also add that BB has a great beer selection. My favorite is the Lion’s Head, a crisp tasting beer that goes great with burgers, bacon and fries.

Emily: I don’t have much more to say, except that BB is hipster. They play old cartoons on the TV. And in their Laguardia Place location, the bathroom is unisex… the bathroom with stalls. I’d say that’s hip. Plus their decor and organic options are hip. We didn’t really touch on the ambiance.

Rob: Oh yeah I totally forgot they play Pokemon on the tv! So great. And don’t worry Emily, we’re coming back here three times by November, so there will be plenty of time to provide deeper analysis.


4 thoughts on “Bareburger

  1. Mark says:

    Another excellent read. But for the record, nothing tops Five Guys. Blasphemy to even compare.

    That said, I admit I still have yet to try my first BB.

  2. Claire says:

    How did I not know of this BB Groupon?! I only ever see ones in Chelsea, and I look at Groupon ALL the time. The one by us is having an anniversary special on 9/20 with food and drink specials all day!

  3. Claire says:

    Update: Just bought a BB GrouponNow! Will be going tonight.

  4. A. Moser says:

    I’m offended because I bought the groupon for your area so you have to go again with me!


Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )


Connecting to %s

Welcome to FIM

Thanks for stopping by! Make sure to follow us on Twitter, Facebook and by email.


Enter your email address to follow FIM and receive notifications of new posts by email.

Join 86 other followers

%d bloggers like this: